How do I recognize the true cause of my emotions?
Q: How do I recognize what causes my feelings to come up? What process will help me know the true cause of these emotions, be they anger, sorrow, etc?
A: We magnetize to ourselves myriad circumstances (be they with humans, animals, nature, or inanimate objects) that will re-stimulate our suppressed, trapped, and denied emotions. Any non-loving vibrations that we carry need to be cleansed, purified, transmuted, and removed from our beings. We also draw circumstances to reflect our divinity. However, for the purposes of this question, I will focus on how we recognize and transmute negative emotions.
In order to recognize the cause of your feelings, first look to your current circumstances. Whether an altercation with a friend, a loved one, a stranger, a cashier, a food server, or someone in traffic, you magnetize people and situations that will re-stimulate your suppressed emotions.
Many people—because of their victim consciousness and “projection” onto others—mistakenly believe that the re-stimulation is the actual cause of the feelings. To put this in layman’s terms, the cashier who was curt or rude to you is not who caused you to be angry. She or he was the instrument you magnetized to re-stimulate your suppressed anger, which was already there before you ever entered the store. Knowing this, from a pro-active, co-creative consciousness, it is easier to find gratitude for that one. Then it’s time to do your homework to uncover from where this anger originated. This is the process of self-inquiry.
For most human beings, the emotional body (our belief systems, patterns, and behaviors) is fully formed by the age of ten. Therefore, most of the distortions in our consciousnesses were laid in somewhere between conception and ten years of age (this, of course, varies from person to person).
Where many people waste time is blaming the re-stimulation (that is, the current circumstance) as the actual cause of the emotion (and, sadly, most people stop there). In so doing, you will only continue to re-create the circumstance over and over again, until you finally realize: “Wait a minute! You didn’t do this to me! In fact, you were showing me, through the grandeur of my own soul (which was wise enough to magnetize this circumstance) what is already inside of me; like a birddog flushing the pheasant out of the bushes. So, therefore, I should only be grateful to you.”
It is helpful to watch for little catch phrases that we inadvertently say that will “tip us off” that we are focused on the re-stimulation (rather than the true cause) of a particular emotion. For instance, someone might say something which triggers you to feel angry, and, in reaction, you may make an offhanded remark, “Oh, she’s just like my mother,” or “My father used to say that.” In saying so, you just found the true source of your non-loving feeling. When do you remember that happening? At what age? When did they say that, and in what circumstance? And there you have the answers.
Then the process continues, because where the emotion was “laid in” (at least by human psychological standards) is actually still not the cause, nor to blame. Anything your parents did to you was also at your soul’s request. The key Truth to always remember is:
You are the only person on the planet. The whole world is a hologram of your thought forms, outpictured for you to integrate and realize all the aspects of your divinity and to change and transmute all the inauthentic aspects of self.
If you want to operate at the causal level of Creation (and, therefore, be truly accountability for your creations), it is critical that you recognize there is no one “out there” and remind yourself of the truth:
“It’s just me. Everyone on the planet is me. And out of the goodness and kindness of your soul, you facilitated and fulfilled my wish—my ardent plea—and granted me this blessing of seeing myself.”
When you come from that level of consciousness, you have a moment of transcendence and you are instantly absolved of blame, shame, guilt, judgement, and projection. Now you are a co-creator with the Divine.
It is all too easy to focus on the “what” of a situation. What happened is a given. “Why?” is the question you want to be asking: “Why did I bring this upon myself, and what is it teaching me?” “How is this inviting me to recreate myself as greater love in this moment?” That’s where the magic is, and that is where true growth and transformation takes place.
There are many processes available to help discharge and release your negative feelings. One of the most powerful is crying. Contrary to what the world says (that crying is weak and pathetic), all crying is healing. Cry that ocean of tears that’s inside of you. It is the highest and quickest path to God.
One of the main reasons people fight and push love away and destroy their friendships and love relationships is because they don’t want to feel, don’t want to cry, and don’t want to have intimacy. Instead, they continue to blame and point the finger at others. But everyone is going to have to cross that bridge—to full accountability—at some point. Why not now?